Friday, December 31, 2004

Mood: Reflective
Song: Sugababes - New Year

With the year coming to an end very soon, I feel that I need to write something to end 2004. Or else it wouldn't seem complete. Not that my year was very complete in the first place, but oh well, it was my contradictory subconscious speaking.

Alrighty, here's a list of my ups and downs for 2004. It's more for my referencing in the future, rather than for my readers (do I even have any??! Well... maybe a couple.. haha), so that I will know how bitchy a person I was in 2004. Hah.

The Good Ones

1. Getting out of army

This was the first uplifting news of 2004, albeit it being rather late. Was originally supposed to be on 1st August, but because of the kindheartedness of Mindef, what with the reduction in the number of years served, I was given an early release on June 30th! Like PUI! I still did not get the full benefit of the reduction! I was only given like one month reduction cuz the earliest date for me to ORD then was 30th June. Oh well, unlucky me always don't get to receive the full benefits of anything. So, what am I complaining about? I should be thankful. I am.

2. My Redang holiday!

It was sorta the first time I was travelling overseas with my friends and without my parents. I do not count the time that I went Thailand during my army days as valid. Well, needless to say, it was a budget holiday (we just came out of army) but we still had fun! And I've got the pictures to prove it! Loved the man-made sand that felt so soft under my feet! And everything else, including the South China Sea! Loved snorkelling, playing beach volleyball, and chilling out at the beach drinking Barcadi breezers at night. Even the long bus journey felt good. For the first time (at that time) I felt free. Free from parents and free from army's iron clutches!

3. Starting school

This is somewhat bittersweet cuz on the good side, I started sorta having a life again, after 2 years and 3 months slaving away in some corrupted organisation. And not to mention, meeting some nice people along the way! But then again, the projects, assignments, essays, interviews to be conducted, endless-sometimes-redundant lectures took all the goodness of school away. Some (or maybe a lot) people might beg to differ (especially if they are the secret muggers who worship every word, regardless of relevance, every lecturer spills out, guarding the words like priceless acquisitions. CF: Gollum in LOTR - myyyyyy prrreeeecccciiiousssss). But weighing the bitter versus the sweet, maybe the sweet sorta wins, not by a landslide, but a marginal margin. Hah. I have to say that because I still have 7 more semesters to go.

4. The Toni & Guy hairshow aka A Vanity Affair!

Wow. This was an exhilarating experience, though at the expense of my precious hair (after being coloured, and re-coloured like within 2 days). But I loved the feeling of walking on stage, catwalking, and showing everyone what you're capable of (i.e. looking good and fabulous). Haha! Many thanks to my friends for turning up and showing support! I'm not sure if I would do this again if I get the chance, but for that once-off opportunity in my life, I'm thankful that I could be glamorous and actually stop feeling ugly for one night. Haha.

5. MINDS Community Project

This was actually part of my school module of CS111 - Singapore Society. Oh, I shall not elaborate on the pains (most of it external events, which translates to... NOT MY OR MY GROUP MEMBERS' FAULT) that we had gone through just to complete the whole project. But once we had the project going, we felt so touched by the intellectually disabled students of MINDS Jurong Gardens School. After all, they are so innocent, and not like the bitchy and sarcastic people we see on a day to day basis. It was a refreshing change, even though it was for a couple of hours. I would gladly do that again. But not for any project though!

6. ERS!

What's there to say? Money from the government is always good! Even though it did not officially occur in 2004 (I get my shares only tomorrow), I received the letter informing me of my entitlement last month, which was still 2004.


The "Bad" Ones

1. ALL disasters, calamities & catastrophes

Nicoll Highway crash - I was actually doing house recce on that fateful night. Urgh. Still remembered that my military car driver and I had to take a longer route because of the collapse, and selfish us were worrying that we had to be called back during the weekend to actually go down to the accident site to help out. But it was truly a disaster, and I guess we could have been more sympathetic towards the victims. Oh! And coincidentally (maybe not) I also lost my Samsung phone that night. Sigh.

The tidal waves in Asia - Rescue work is still currently going on, and reading all that news in the papers and watching television everyday made me realise how fortunate I am. In a way. My family actually donated some stuff the other day. I still feel helpless somewhat though.

2. Exams!

Argh! Haven't faced them since 'A' levels! If you are one of those Gollum-like people mentioned earlier, you can stop reading. Because I know you will disagree with everything that I say below.

Seriously speaking, it was a killer, and though I'm still surviving, I am not in the best state of health. (What am I rambling on about??!) Oh well, what I meant to say, was that I wasn't that prepared. Yeah. And so it's bad.

3. Not staying in hall

It was a very bad decision (partly courtesy of a friend who accidentally didn't pay the registration fees) and I regret it till this day. But well, I can only move on.

4. Getting conned off the net

Yes, you read it correctly. Intelligent me was actually conned by some shitty (I hope you get tortured incessantly and die the most horrible death!) European (I think) earlier in July this year. I shall not elaborate. Damn embarrassing! Only some friends know about it, and I hope it remains that way. But I've learnt my lesson very well (give me an exam on that!) and I know it will never happen again. So there.


What I WANT (notice the urgency and determination!) for 2005

1. Better school grades

I was an average student last semester and I don't want it to remain that way. Period

2. Argue less with my parents (i.e. Dad)

I actually quarrelled with him over some mundane, trite, trivial, frivolous, superficial issue on X'mas day this year. Argh. I think I must control myself and my temper more.

3. iPod

It's like everyone has it. I'm a follower. What do you think??! Haha... Anyone getting my birthday hint?! In my defence, I feel that it's high time I change my old mp3 player. But oh well, I will dwell on the issue more when I've checked out the prices at campus.

4. Go to church more often

I think I need some spiritual guidance. Been too bitchy which I know is very bad. Haha... Seriously though, I think I need some direction in my life sometimes. Don't want to get lost and not know my way back.

5. Be less demanding, impatient, self-centred and selfish

Right, I say this almost every year, but I feel that maybe 2005 is the time for me to change all that mentioned aboved, and maybe some other vices, which I shall not divulge. I want to be a better person, that's all. Is that so hard to achieve? Perhaps it is. That's why I need No. 4.

=====

Okies, that was my exhausting list of the hits and misses of 2004 and my sorta New Year resolutions! Just a final note: Happy New Year to everyone and may fireworks spark off in your lives and mine in the coming year!!! Yay!!!!!!!

Gv complained @ 10:25 PM

{xoxo}

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Mood: Stoic
Song: Diana DeGarmo - Emotional

My mom just bought 2 of Jay Chou's albums, "Qi Li Xiang" and "Ye Hui Mei"! OMG! How hip is that? LOL. Was quite shocked when she told me to put it on the stereo for her. Haha... I think she started liking Jay after Sly sang "An Jing" at the S'pore Idol finals. Hmmm... I shall cease to comment. After all, ain't it cool that your mom shares your taste in music? Pity the 2 albums do not have "An Jing" though. Maybe I should get the correct album with the song in it for her. Haha... Which reminds me, my Destiny's Child "Survivor" album from 2001 is still somewhere in her office. I think she forgot to return it to me after borrowing it, which was 3 years ago??! OMG.

Went Queensway today to do bag shopping, and at last my efforts have been rewarded! Yay! Got a mini duffel bag (and obviously not army green!) which I think is quite cool. Oh, it's brown in colour. Min got the same bag (after heavy persuasion and her inability to not succumb to temptation) in white. And the price is quite economical too, which is wonderful, leaving no holes in my wallet. Thank God.

Some shop assistant tried to cheat me today. Urgh. Was in this apparel shop looking at the tees and the guy was like telling me, "Oh, these (gesturing to a rack of tees) are from Hong Kong, and these (another rack) are from Korea."

I picked up a tee from the supposed rack of tees to be from HK, and saw "Made in Thailand" printed proudly on the label. Like haha... I just casually replied, "But it says 'Made in Thailand' here."

He was naturally speechless.

But in the end, I don't know what came over me, I bought one of the $19.90 "made in Thailand" tees, and almost immediately regretted it. Reason? I have a sneaking suspicion that it will shrink after washing. I have had bad experience from "made in Thailand" tees before, and I am quite sure that this particular maroon tee that I bought will suffer the same inevitable fate. Oh well. I can't possibly go back and request for a refund. So I shall live with my bad decisions.

Speaking of bad decisions, I also don't know what came over me at the start of last semester when I rejected a hall offer. Reason at that time? I didn't want to live with strangers. But yet, ironically, I submitted my name for the ad-hoc applications last week. I think I have had enough of long journeys in squeezy train carriages. But well, fate was not kind, and I didn't get it. Actually I sorta expected it, as there were like millions applying, and the vacancies were like three or four per hall. I never had a history of being lucky.

But then, my "insignificant" schoolmate (she said it, not me!) got it!!!! Arrrrrrrrrrrrgh!!!! Why is she so lucky??! Damn... I should get her to pick 4D and Toto numbers for me, and I will be a millionaire next week! That way, I can easily purchase one of the apartments near school, and never be bothered about distance for the next few semesters! That's such a perfect plan!

I am so smart sometimes, I startle myself. NOT.

Gv complained @ 10:20 PM

{xoxo}

Monday, December 27, 2004

Mood: Mentally exhausted
Song: Destiny's Child - Soldier

Phew, finally I changed the image on my blog, and it's 50% original. Haha, I got the picture off some abstract website, and added the text in myself. Why the sudden change? Well, one of my schoolmates had a friend with the exact same layout as moi! And obviously I can't stand someone else having the exact blogskin as me. So I searched around the whole bloody day for a new blogskin, which alas, I can't find any that suited my preferences. Besides I love the current one too much. In the end, I decided to just change the picture. At least it's not the identical to anyone else's unless they download my picture. Which I highly doubt will ever happen. So there.

I just think the picture gives me more of an abstract (read: feeling feeling... haha!) touch to the whole layout. So loving it at the moment!

And going shopping (again!) tomorrow! I know you people must think that I must have shitloads of money to spend, which unfortunately isn't true to any small, miniscule extent. I'm just going out to look for a bargain. Call me a cheapo, I don't really care. Hah.

Gv complained @ 10:07 PM

{xoxo}

Sunday, December 26, 2004

My dad found $30 in a male toilet today. Why aren't I so lucky?! Damn. Okay, $30 isn't a lot of money in this day and age, but still, it could've gotten me like 6 McDonald's EVM from NTU (not outside cuz they cost more than $5 for each EVM), or a brand new tee from Zara or some other store in town, or 9 three-for-$10 t-shirts from any pasar malam in Singapore. I refuse to compare the $30 to the number of packets of chicken rice that I could've bought. It's time to change the old "adage" of equating $2 to chicken rice, and therefore $30 would have gotten me 15 packets of yummy chicken rice. No? No!

First of all, chicken rice costs at least $2.50 a packet now. So the $2 a packet is very, extremely outdated. For stalls who still charge $2 per packet, maybe you should follow the trend set by other hawkers.

I don't care whether chicken rice lovers come after me, because I do not really have an avid love towards the dish. Or maybe I haven't been eating at the right places. Usually I get plates of not-fragrant-at-all rice, with not-boneless, greasy, stiff, rubbery chicken in pathetic servings. I just don't see what is the big hoo-ha over it, be it locals or foreigners. Or perhaps it's just my insignificant preference.

Alrighty, I think I'm digressing too much. Anyway, what I wanted to say was that I wish I could be fortunate enough to actually pick money off the streets. And this is excluding the times when I picked up 5 cents or 20 cents. The biggest amount I've ever picked up was a $1 coin, I think. Oh well, money just won't fall from the sky for me. This is sad.

Gv complained @ 2:31 PM

{xoxo}

Friday, December 24, 2004

Mood: Pissed off

My new, worn-only-once "I am entitled to be grumpy" t-shirt that I bought from Topman is soiled. I am considering whether to throw it away or ask my mom to try to salvage it. But I seriously doubt that anything can be done to rectify it. Blame it on the stupid McDonald's foldover I had in the cinema the other day when I accidentally dripped mayonnaise on it, which left it with stains which are still unwashable till this point of the day. Furthermore, I think the detergent or whatever was being used to wash it has sorta discoloured the collar/neck area which left yellow stains on it, which look totally unsightly on the actual dark green base. Urgh. I think I am damn particular about the way my clothes look and stuff. I'm not too sure whether I can accept this. Maybe if the mayonnaise stains come off. The collar might seem negligible then.

Or I might just pop in to get another new t-shirt. What a way to start off my X'mas eve. And I shall not elaborate on the little almost-heated argument I had with my dad earlier. Sometimes I think the best way is to not have the conversation. I'll just let him say whatever he has to say to get it off his chest, and I'll just leave it hanging in the air until the words dissipate. I see no point in arguing and antagonising him further. I'll just say, "We're not having this conversation." It'll die down after a while.

And maybe I'll cool down. I think I need to.

Gv complained @ 1:29 PM

{xoxo}

Thursday, December 23, 2004

Mood: Yay!
Song: Mariah Carey - All I Want For Christmas Is You (ain't that an annual classic that's a must-listen during the X'mas season?! That was a rhetorical question, by the way!)

Alrighty, didn't really accomplish what I wanted to do today, which was to get the $103.95 Projectshop bag. Too expensive for something that doesn't look like $100! I know I am materialistic, but who isn't? I want my stuff to look what they cost. I don't feel like I'm a poser whatsoever, and I don't really care what people think. I've learnt through the years to just let it go and let those people who despise or patronise me to do what they like. After all, they can't control what I do, and vice versa. So why waste my time bothering? I think I have better things to do, like concentrating on my studies or doing more shopping. Haha.

Okie, but I managed to salvage myself by getting two new tees and a Fossil watch! The watch was some sort of an impulsive buy, but I'm not regretting it! Always wanted a new watch since my old Swatch broke down, and I can't be bothered to go fix it. I wanted to hint to my friends to get me a new watch for my next birthday, especially since we've been buying watches for other people's birthdays, but then again, sometimes these people can't get even the most obvious hints. And I don't want to tell them directly what I want. Loses the surprise element there. So therefore, thus, henceforth, I bought what I wanted myself! No hassle, no hints, not a lot of money (since it was on 15% discount, and it's Fossil, endorsed by Stefanie Sun, haha, so worth the $100++) and I'm happy! Is there a better way?! I doubt it. Anyway, this is how the watch looks. Nice right? Haha...



Had one sorta eyebrow raising incident earlier at this street shop in Bugis though. I was browsing through the t-shirts with Min and Freddie, and this Malay bitch and her equally whatever friend came up to me to ask me the price of one of the t-shirts. Like hello? Do I bloody hell do like a sales assistant?! I wasn't really angry or pissed at that point. I just politely (how rare) told them that I'm not a SA. And they mumbled their apologies. Or maybe they didn't even apologise. Didn't bother myself with them. Urgh. Heard them mumbling about "malu-ing" themselves. Oh whatever. This is the first time in my whole life that I'm actually mistaken for a SA. I know that the store does not require a dress code or uniform, but me??! A sales assistant? Like are you blind? Or just too plain stupid to distinguish between a customer and a SA? Never mind, I think I sounded somewhat racist there, which wasn't intentional.

I'm still a little sore that I haven't gotten my bag! School's starting soon, and I need a new bag cuz I'm sick of carrying the same old denim one everyday! I need variety, I need change. Most of the bags that I saw were reasonably priced, but I think some might be overpriced. Like those shops which sell solely only bags? I think the owner imports them from Thailand or Malaysia and sells them at exorbitant prices, that I think it's not worth paying for. Especially with fraying ends, and threads running astray here and there. The workmanship isn't up to my standards (which is pretty high, if I so admit myself). So now I need to continue on my journey on seeking the perfect bag with little stray threads before school starts, or else I'll be relegated back to my old bag, which I still love, but just feel a little bored with it. Anyway, we are planning to go Queensway next week (on the day when Freddie doesn't have perpetual cheerleading practice) and scout for more things! Can't wait... but oh well, maybe I should let my bank balance be stagnant for a few days first before depleting again.

I am still not in the Christmas mood. Hopefully it'll change this Saturday when my family goes out to celebrate.

Gv complained @ 10:06 PM

{xoxo}

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Mood: Anticipative
Song: Jamelia - Stop

I am not patronising the Pastamania at Plaza Singapura ever again, or as long as I can withstand it. Why? The carbonara pasta left me heaving over my toilet bowl and regurgitating its creamy contents out strand by strand last night. That is so not a good feeling. Somehow I've speculated that the not-very-fresh cream has left my stomach rejecting it a couple of hours after consumption. Or maybe one of the staff spat into my food, not that I can think of any valid reason why those people would do that. Nevertheless, that place is crossed out in my list of cheap, potential places to dine at. Just like Yoshinoya at Bugis 3 years ago when I was still in college. I'm still keeping the promise to myself to never eat there again, or any other branch, for that matter.

Gv complained @ 8:53 PM

{xoxo}

Friday, December 17, 2004

Mood: Partially lifted
Song: Bryan McFadden - Real To Me (somewhat addictive)

Some recent updates. Met Ruth at Yakun last Sunday, and after the initial introductions, we set about to discuss the article. Did a mad rush to complete it on Wednesday night/midnight, and managed to sorta meet the deadline (assuming my editor doesn't check mail in the wee hours of the morning). Good news is... I think the people at the Nanyang Chronicle are quite okay with the first draft, didn't complain about anything whatsoever. But... they see the topic (AIDS) as a potential big issue. And therefore, more writing, extension of deadline, pushing back of publication date, etc. This translates to more work for me (us). And more interviews to be conducted, sourcing for more people to answer my yet-to-be-decided questions, and the works. Oh well, can't say I'm not excited in any way at seeing our article published. But the amount of work behind a 700-800 word article? I measure it in tonnes.

Been feeling sick as of late. Must be too much of the stay-at-home syndrome. Didn't get such illnesses during the semester when I was rushing to school, completing projects, writing essays, and preparing (not a lot) for exams. Oh well, the cycle's about to start soon in a couple of weeks. I guess I'd better enjoy my days at home. But then again, having a perpetually blocked nostril 24/7 isn't that great a sensation. Not considering a scratchy throat for days, and a general lethargy due to feeling feverish. Urgh.

Some uplifting news. Went shopping yesterday! Didn't buy a lot though. Just a new pair of denims with a couple of t-shirts from Topman. But I'm satisfied. For now. Minlee and I saw a to-die-for bag in Projectshop that we both wanted to get. But, my wallet'll be dead after paying the price. We're still considering at the moment though. Never say never! Haha... hopefully we can go again next week. Need to stock up my always empty (in my opinion only, others see illusions of clothes everywhere) wardrobe.

Need to finish this book by Tony Parsons (One For My Baby) before school starts. I know I won't have time whatsoever in a couple of weeks. Gotta brace myself for the inevitable onslaught of lethal school assignments!

Gv complained @ 10:45 PM

{xoxo}

Friday, December 10, 2004

Today: Adrenaline rush
Song: JJ Lin Junjie - Di Er Tian Tang (2nd Heaven)

Went back to school today to do subject registration for next semester. Oh. My. God. There are actually sooooo many kiasu people out there! Me, inclusive, of course. If not I would not have gotten what I wanted. But then again, I still cannot beat a hell load of people, cuz they actually took my first choice time slot for Social Psychology. It was really a case of the fastest fingers first (or fastest mouse clicking, dragging, keyboard typing first). Urgh.

Perversely, I actually had some fun doing it, especially when it was time to play the waiting game. Waiting for people to drop their timeslots and register for another one, so that we can capitalise on their "given up" timeslots. Haha. In the end, we managed to get the same timeslots for everything, except for Irwin who had to settle for another tutorial group for CS106 Speech and Presentation, cuz apparently he wasn't fast enough. Oh well, we shall see what happens next semester. I can't believe that I actually have to go through this kind of adrenaline rush every semester.

Someone else called me to ask me to help co-write an article for the school paper regarding AIDS. Another downer, deadline, whatever. And the dean is going to proof-read it first before publishing! Argh! This is like so major stress right now. Gotta find my interviewees, research on information, contact my co-writer (I still dunno who she is, and vice versa!) and write it by next Wednesday. And most importantly, what an uninspiring topic.

Totally crap. At least I'm sorta looking forward to retail therapy next week. Haha, but now with the deadline looming, I'm not so sure anymore. Sigh.

Gv complained @ 8:07 PM

{xoxo}

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

Mood: Bittersweet
Song: Girls Aloud - I'll Stand By You

Got an unexpected surprise this morning when I turned on my notebook. Exam results are out. Urgh. I was like mindlessly surfing the NTU site checking for subject registration for next semester when I stumbled upon the examinations link. I just clicked on it, and voila... something that I wasn't ready to see, but yet was displayed prominently on the screen in front of my bespectabled eyes.

Thank God I passed everything, though the grades were just like average. (bitter!) And thankfully, no takeaway for me. (sweet! Phew.) I actually had a dream like one week back when I dreamt that I did fairly well and I sorta expected the dream to come true. Well, I have had such dreams before (during As and Os) and they were on the dot accurate. I guess my prophesizing powers have deteriorated drastically. But nevertheless, I will work harder next semester. Actually I think it's not a 'I will' thing here, but a 'I must'. Oh well.

Makes no consolation that a couple of my friends did better than moi. Just to get this straight, I'm not those kind of sore losers who must excel everyone in everything. But somehow I feel that this time, we would have more or less gotten the same grades since we studied together. Or maybe I shouldn't make such an assumption. It's not technically correct, and I can't overlook the fact that some others might be secret muggers who put on false fronts. Hmmm... there are other result haters out there. I should join their league.

Gv complained @ 1:08 PM

{xoxo}

Saturday, December 04, 2004

Mood: Mixed

Just stumbed onto something, and I've sorta found out that some people are not telling the truth. Not that it affects me or anything, but I feel that there should be honesty sometimes in friendships. I admit that I've lied, white lies maybe, but this situation is somewhat a little more serious.

I wonder how long they are going to keep the truth from me. And I am also unsure whether I can really tell them my truth. Don't know whether I'll ever be at ease. Sometimes I'm just a sucker for details.

Gv complained @ 3:46 PM

{xoxo}

Friday, December 03, 2004

Mood: Neutral (for just a very short while)
Song: Britney Spears - My Prerogative

Haven't found the inclination to update. Let's see, I've been to KBox thrice in November (twice in a week) and I went to KBox again today with Minlee and Freddie. What a life huh? I can proudly say that I can sing more than 10 Chinese songs now. I used to be able to sing zilch - zero - none - mostly (or all) English songs. I am seeking to improve some more. Haha.

Finally finished Dan Brown's Angels and Demons earlier this week. Wow, what can I say? Haven't been so riveted to a book since Harry Potter! A pity Dan only has like 4 books out published, but I guess someone of his caliber needs to do a lot of research before writing a bestselling novel. Therefore, fans must wait and wait for donkey years before the next bestseller is published. My, I wish I could be like that someday, just writing like one book every 2 years, and living off the royalties and stuff from the sales. But then again, in a small, puny market like Singapore where people don't really buy shitloads of books, it's rather difficult. Or rather, exceptionally, impossibly difficult. Ah well, some things are better off remaining as fantasies? ...???!!!

Arghhh... results are gonna be released on Thursday! This is bittersweet because I can't wait to get it over and done with (registration for next semester's subjects etc) but at the same time, I fear. Fear not doing well. Or rather fear failing something, and having to 'ta bao' - takeaway - repeating that particular bloody module. It is not uncommon, it is not impossible. I should stop thinking about it.

End of story.

Gv complained @ 10:51 PM

{xoxo}