Friday, December 31, 2004

Mood: Reflective
Song: Sugababes - New Year

With the year coming to an end very soon, I feel that I need to write something to end 2004. Or else it wouldn't seem complete. Not that my year was very complete in the first place, but oh well, it was my contradictory subconscious speaking.

Alrighty, here's a list of my ups and downs for 2004. It's more for my referencing in the future, rather than for my readers (do I even have any??! Well... maybe a couple.. haha), so that I will know how bitchy a person I was in 2004. Hah.

The Good Ones

1. Getting out of army

This was the first uplifting news of 2004, albeit it being rather late. Was originally supposed to be on 1st August, but because of the kindheartedness of Mindef, what with the reduction in the number of years served, I was given an early release on June 30th! Like PUI! I still did not get the full benefit of the reduction! I was only given like one month reduction cuz the earliest date for me to ORD then was 30th June. Oh well, unlucky me always don't get to receive the full benefits of anything. So, what am I complaining about? I should be thankful. I am.

2. My Redang holiday!

It was sorta the first time I was travelling overseas with my friends and without my parents. I do not count the time that I went Thailand during my army days as valid. Well, needless to say, it was a budget holiday (we just came out of army) but we still had fun! And I've got the pictures to prove it! Loved the man-made sand that felt so soft under my feet! And everything else, including the South China Sea! Loved snorkelling, playing beach volleyball, and chilling out at the beach drinking Barcadi breezers at night. Even the long bus journey felt good. For the first time (at that time) I felt free. Free from parents and free from army's iron clutches!

3. Starting school

This is somewhat bittersweet cuz on the good side, I started sorta having a life again, after 2 years and 3 months slaving away in some corrupted organisation. And not to mention, meeting some nice people along the way! But then again, the projects, assignments, essays, interviews to be conducted, endless-sometimes-redundant lectures took all the goodness of school away. Some (or maybe a lot) people might beg to differ (especially if they are the secret muggers who worship every word, regardless of relevance, every lecturer spills out, guarding the words like priceless acquisitions. CF: Gollum in LOTR - myyyyyy prrreeeecccciiiousssss). But weighing the bitter versus the sweet, maybe the sweet sorta wins, not by a landslide, but a marginal margin. Hah. I have to say that because I still have 7 more semesters to go.

4. The Toni & Guy hairshow aka A Vanity Affair!

Wow. This was an exhilarating experience, though at the expense of my precious hair (after being coloured, and re-coloured like within 2 days). But I loved the feeling of walking on stage, catwalking, and showing everyone what you're capable of (i.e. looking good and fabulous). Haha! Many thanks to my friends for turning up and showing support! I'm not sure if I would do this again if I get the chance, but for that once-off opportunity in my life, I'm thankful that I could be glamorous and actually stop feeling ugly for one night. Haha.

5. MINDS Community Project

This was actually part of my school module of CS111 - Singapore Society. Oh, I shall not elaborate on the pains (most of it external events, which translates to... NOT MY OR MY GROUP MEMBERS' FAULT) that we had gone through just to complete the whole project. But once we had the project going, we felt so touched by the intellectually disabled students of MINDS Jurong Gardens School. After all, they are so innocent, and not like the bitchy and sarcastic people we see on a day to day basis. It was a refreshing change, even though it was for a couple of hours. I would gladly do that again. But not for any project though!

6. ERS!

What's there to say? Money from the government is always good! Even though it did not officially occur in 2004 (I get my shares only tomorrow), I received the letter informing me of my entitlement last month, which was still 2004.


The "Bad" Ones

1. ALL disasters, calamities & catastrophes

Nicoll Highway crash - I was actually doing house recce on that fateful night. Urgh. Still remembered that my military car driver and I had to take a longer route because of the collapse, and selfish us were worrying that we had to be called back during the weekend to actually go down to the accident site to help out. But it was truly a disaster, and I guess we could have been more sympathetic towards the victims. Oh! And coincidentally (maybe not) I also lost my Samsung phone that night. Sigh.

The tidal waves in Asia - Rescue work is still currently going on, and reading all that news in the papers and watching television everyday made me realise how fortunate I am. In a way. My family actually donated some stuff the other day. I still feel helpless somewhat though.

2. Exams!

Argh! Haven't faced them since 'A' levels! If you are one of those Gollum-like people mentioned earlier, you can stop reading. Because I know you will disagree with everything that I say below.

Seriously speaking, it was a killer, and though I'm still surviving, I am not in the best state of health. (What am I rambling on about??!) Oh well, what I meant to say, was that I wasn't that prepared. Yeah. And so it's bad.

3. Not staying in hall

It was a very bad decision (partly courtesy of a friend who accidentally didn't pay the registration fees) and I regret it till this day. But well, I can only move on.

4. Getting conned off the net

Yes, you read it correctly. Intelligent me was actually conned by some shitty (I hope you get tortured incessantly and die the most horrible death!) European (I think) earlier in July this year. I shall not elaborate. Damn embarrassing! Only some friends know about it, and I hope it remains that way. But I've learnt my lesson very well (give me an exam on that!) and I know it will never happen again. So there.


What I WANT (notice the urgency and determination!) for 2005

1. Better school grades

I was an average student last semester and I don't want it to remain that way. Period

2. Argue less with my parents (i.e. Dad)

I actually quarrelled with him over some mundane, trite, trivial, frivolous, superficial issue on X'mas day this year. Argh. I think I must control myself and my temper more.

3. iPod

It's like everyone has it. I'm a follower. What do you think??! Haha... Anyone getting my birthday hint?! In my defence, I feel that it's high time I change my old mp3 player. But oh well, I will dwell on the issue more when I've checked out the prices at campus.

4. Go to church more often

I think I need some spiritual guidance. Been too bitchy which I know is very bad. Haha... Seriously though, I think I need some direction in my life sometimes. Don't want to get lost and not know my way back.

5. Be less demanding, impatient, self-centred and selfish

Right, I say this almost every year, but I feel that maybe 2005 is the time for me to change all that mentioned aboved, and maybe some other vices, which I shall not divulge. I want to be a better person, that's all. Is that so hard to achieve? Perhaps it is. That's why I need No. 4.

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Okies, that was my exhausting list of the hits and misses of 2004 and my sorta New Year resolutions! Just a final note: Happy New Year to everyone and may fireworks spark off in your lives and mine in the coming year!!! Yay!!!!!!!

Gv complained @ 10:25 PM

{xoxo}